About Me

United Kingdom
About the Author: Young Rumpole approves of the manly back-slapping and guffaws that accompany his bouffant hair-do. Takes a broad-brush approach to life in general, but can be pedantic to the point of picking pointless arguments with canteen staff. Frequently has little or no idea what anyone is talking about.

Thursday 15 November 2012

Of Jurors

The methods of the Jury are not only a mystery to practitioners but are also meant to stay that way. The Jury Bailiff is sworn with the following oath:

Do you swear to keep this jury in some private and convenient place, to suffer none to talk to them, nor talk to them yourself concerning the trial this day, unless it be to ask them if they are agreed on a verdict?

The fact that the Bailiff then normally says, "Right ladies and gents, bring all your papers and maps with you and follow me" would appear to be in breach of that oath, but there it is.

There are always the anecdotal tales of Jurors coming out afterwards to witnesses or court staff and saying, "Eeee, we only acquitted because we liked that nice Mr X", referring to the ageing silk, with the twinkle in his eye, and the pocket handkerchief spilling from his top pocket.

Such an example recently came my way: The defendant was accused of punching a man to the floor, and setting about him with others by kicking him whilst he was down.

Silk (ponderously): So he was punching you, you say? 

Witness: Yeah, he was punching me but kicking me too.

Silk (ponderously): Yes, yes, punching you say?

Witness: No, he were kicking me too, kicking me, they all were.

Silk: Hmm, yes, punching...

Witness (irate): No, he were kicking me, kicking me

Judge (also irate): He said kicking! K-I-C-K-I-N-G.

Silk (silkily): Yes your honour. (Pause) My problem you see is hearing, not spelling

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